Nick Stellino Blog

WCNY: What was your biggest challenge in this episode?

by Rouhollah Goudarzi

February 8, 2017

Chef Stellino: My Father’s fish soup was a tremendously difficult segment to film. I wanted to capture a poetic imagery of one of the first dishes I cooked with my dad when I was just a little boy. At one point I almost went into a trance and continued my filmed performance as if I was a kid, with my dad next to me, saying: “Bravo Nicola, cosi’ si fa! (Good Nick this is how you do it!)”I found myself overwhelmed with emotion, which came over me like a river in full. I don’t know, maybe I am crazy but I felt as if he was there. When he passed, some 11 years ago, I went into a state of depression that affected me deeply. I found a way back to the light by cooking and talking to him as if he was next to me. Whilst I have no physical proof, I am convinced he was and this is how I was able to tell him many things I never did when he was alive. It has been said that the greatest pain, is the pain of longing for something you cannot have. I believe I was granted a grace from God and that my father and I were able to connect after he went to other side, not through words, but through the ritual of making his food. There was more to this cooking show than just filming my cooking.